virgin islands scene

The main dangers in this life are the people who want to change everything or nothing.
-- Nancy Astor
 

 

Saturday, May 16, 2026

Discerning assertiveness

If you never assert yourself, you lose effectiveness. If you assert yourself all the time, you also lose effectiveness.

The key is to save your assertiveness for when you know it will result in a positive outcome for all involved. Avoid asserting yourself just for the sake of doing so, or merely to show you can.

Being a full time bully or a full time patsy is not going to get you anywhere good. Be assertive when, and only when your assertiveness will move the situation forward.

Asserting yourself will not create confidence when you have no confidence to begin with. Work to first become confident in yourself and in what you seek to advocate, then you can succeed in pushing it forward.

Empty promises give you little basis on which to assert anything. If your actions are already generating valuable results, that’s when your assertions carry weight.

Assertiveness can be a powerful tool, though it can very easily be spread too thin. Make good use of it, but only when it is truly called for.

— Ralph Marston

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